My Struggle and a Post Share: My Daughter's Beauty

I have been struggling for quite a while, probably since the moment that I found out I was having a girl, as to the fact that I am raising a daughter in 2012. During a time when clothing and morals seem optional. In a culture that seems to almost hate women. How will I remind her that God made her perfect and make her believe it? How will I remind her that she is always enough? How do I teach her that fleeting beauty is not most important? How will I talk her through 'the awkward years?' Of which mine were many... How will I deal with the fact that sometimes she won't put a lot of stock into what I believe to be true about her? How will I console her if a boy breaks her heart, and how will I stop Cliff from killing him? Over and over, the questions and fears, both rational and irrational, cascade through my mind. Luckily, a Facebook friend, with a daughter around the same age as Macy, posted this article today. It was written by a father about his daughter, and offers some insight on some of the issues I was writing about above. I find such solace in reading this and maybe you will too.

How do I raise my daughter to know the true definition of beauty in a culture such as ours? How do I cultivate an image in her that is rooted in the beauty of Jesus and not the allure of a distorted sexuality?

Here are three points that I have found helpful in my journey:

Our Culture’s Definition of Beauty

In most societies, feminine worth is determined by how you live up to the cultural definition of “real womanhood.” In Dallas real womanhood is largely defined by physical beauty, and beauty is determined by which men find you attractive, which means feminine worth is defined by the ability to attract men. This is a heartbreaking perversion of why God created two sexes that leaves insecurity and broken marriages in its wake.

The Biblical Foundation of Beauty

God is the definition of beauty because He is absolute holiness, which is why scriptures like 1 Samuel 16:7and Proverbs 31:30 define beauty internally and teach that God is after our hearts. Our definition of beauty should then begin with godly character flowing from the purity of heart.

We also know from Song of Solomon that God created men to find women attractive, serving as a physical representation of how the Church finds Christ desirable above all things. Thus, any exploitation of women’s bodies for the attraction or the lust of man is a distortion of God’s created intent and a product of the Fall.

Practical Steps for Shepherding

Abandoning our city to avoid the realities of a fallen world won’t reverse the effects of sin in our families. The only solution is the gospel of Jesus Christ.

But how do we pursue this? Here are a few practical ways:

• Teach your daughter early and often that God loves her. The Lord designed her exactly as He wanted her. Speak truth to her before she hears the lie.
• Affirm this truth. Tell your daughter she is beautiful and that you love being her father or mother. I cannot say this enough to my daughter, Eisley, and I’m determined by the grace of God to not have her grow up searching for the affirmation she was designed to get from her father.
• Teach her early that sexuality is designed by God and meant to flourish inside of marriage.
• Guard her environment. You cannot avoid all images, but don’t be foolish in what you let your daughter see.
• Take her on dates. Model the unconditional love of the Father through uninterrupted time with her father.
• Develop a family mantra about beauty: “Where does beauty come from? The heart. Why? Because God looks there.”
• Be aware of the schemes of Satan in your daughter’s life. Ex: The mall is not evil in and of itself, but there is a strong pull there to worldly passions. When we leave the mall, I want to tell Eisley repeatedly that I love her, she is beautiful, I love being her daddy and that Jesus loves her.
• Be aware of the schemes of Satan in your life. Satan hates your daughter and wants her worship and destruction. The best way to get to her is through her headship. For the sake of God’s glory in the joy of your children, pursue holiness.
• Pray, beg, plead. Our best laid plans are feeble compared to the craftiness of Satan, and we are desperately dependent on the Spirit to do what only the Spirit can do: open her eyes to Jesus.

As a father with many parenting mistakes in my future, I am still learning. And I know that, more than anything, I need the grace of God as I seek to raise up my daughter in the ways of the Lord.

It comes with such relief that other Christians struggle with this same battle. I have said it before and I will say it again, I think Satan's biggest victory is if he can make us truly believe that we are alone in our struggles. I know that Cliff will be an incredible father and we have already spent many hours in conversation and strategy planning on this subject alone. I think my biggest worry is me. This past year and a half, I have desperately been trying to work on me and trying to make myself un-believe the lie that I am not enough or unworthy of unconditional love. Because I have to believe it before I can make Macy believe it. This is one of the reasons, of which there are many, that I am so thankful to be rooted in faith in Christ and to believe that he has made and will continue to make everything perfect. His plans are masterful and he knows what he's doing.

Sorry for the heavy topics the past few days! In lighter news, the week is half over and Labor Day is next week! It still feels somewhat like summer to me since I didn't go back to school for the first time in twenty years, but I sure am enjoying all the family time I have been getting these past two weeks. Pure bliss! 

So much love to you and yours, and may you be encouraged today by the unending love of our Father in Heaven who cares for us in a way that we could never hope for or imagine.

Less is more

You may be noticing a few changes here on McGraw's Plus One. Apparently, I decided tonight was the night to change it all up. I was really tired of the look of the old blog. The old design was a little too kitschy. Ugh. Well, I guess I had such a strong reaction to the old design that I went the complete opposite way. The new look is super minimal, but I like it. I guess I'm thinking that if you aren't continually editing, revamping, rechecking and restyling you will find yourself in a hot mess sooner rather than later. The same goes for your wardrobe, accessories, shoes, home, all of it. We recently got new carpet, and it was the perfect excuse to do some editing in the house. The only problem is that now half of my garage is filled with crap. Anyway, it will find it's way out soon enough, and the whole process has been so cathartic. All in all, fall feels like a fresh start and this whole cleansing process has been exactly what we needed. Some parting words that are wonderful to live by-

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What do you think of the new blog design? Are you doing anything to help clean your slate for this Fall?

Fall- More like fall in love!

Who doesn't love Fall? I live in east Texas, and with our weather we only have hot, hotter, hellishly hot, then not as hot. Fall just so happens to be one of the not as hot times. So, we have to hurry and pull out all our boots, scarves, blazers, and other lovely things so we have enough time to enjoy them. There are so many things that I am excited about this Fall. First of all, let me talk about my girl, Tory. Yes, Tory Burch. I feel like she and I would be great friends. All we need is an introduction. But anyway, I just need her to hire me to only wear her clothes for the rest of my life. Some of my favorite things from her new Fall line...

{Tory Burch}

I'm sad this has that terrible button in the middle of the picture, because the color is so beautiful. That beautiful green, Ultramarine Green, if you will. Thank you, Pantone. I love dresses and a bow blouse. I have one in a beautiful red and I can't wait to break it out!

{Tory Burch}

I'm going to need to track down a peplum- anything. Peplum blouse, skirt, dress, I will literally take anything. While I am in love with Tory Burch there are several other things that I am loving right now. For instance, this fabulous velvet blazer. Apparently, I am drawn to this beautiful green.

{J Crew}

I am a sucker for jackets, but an even bigger sucker for a good jacket with an atypical neckline or shape. This explains my obsession with this All Saints Carmine leather jacket. As of right now, I can't find any for sale, but I'm pretty sure that my budget would not recuperate from this. 

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So onto something a little more manageable, what about a watch from Fossil's new rose line. 

{Fossil}

And, of course, I would be remiss to not mention the J Crew bubble necklace. I think this is so cute and can make anything better. For example, my precious cousin posted a picture on Facebook of her in her work shirt, which let's be real those aren't always the best, but she was wearing a turquoise version of this necklace and it was adorable!! 

{J Crew}

Boots, boots, boots. Really, just shoes, in general. I love them! Particularly, the top two on the right in the picture below. Of course, I could pretty much be talked into anything from Nordstrom. 

{Nordstrom}

Also, my new work essential, the ankle pant. As of right now, I only have white, which is going to be a big problem in about 10 days, AKA Labor Day, when it is no longer socially appropriate to wear white. How unfortunate, but life will go on and I will probably be buying a pair in every color available.

{Express}

I can't finish this post without mentioning my new obsession, Shabby Apple. This is one of their new pieces, the Panthera. Remember what I said about atypical necklines, it doesn't just apply to jackets.

{Shabby Apple}

And another, the Aquaria. This company has such lovely pieces. I am one lucky girl too, because I just found out the wonderful boutique in my town will begin carrying Shabby Apple in January! Ah, so excited! I will be saving my pennies!

{Shabby Apple}

Anyway, I could go on and on about everything I want to wear this Fall. What are you excited about adding to your wardrobe in the coming months? 

Much love!

It's Here! It's Here! It's Here!

So sorry for the delay in blogging my faithful followers, but all of my creative powers have been directed at my new 'toy'! The Sizzix Eclips!! 

My new toy came in at just the right time because it is back to school time, and the country club for which I work was having a Back to School Splash and we got to make goody bags! We were trying to be smart with money so I didn't fill them too much but still wanted them to be special to the kids. I decided to make 'tags' (as I called them, but they were actually quite large, about 5" by 8") to put inside the clear zipper bags and I tried to personalize them for the kids that would  be there then just make the other ones clever and cute. See some examples below :)

I even got to play around with some bigger projects, like cutting out my husband's youth group logo! The logo is so intricate but the Eclips had no problem! The logo turned out so cool!

Now forgive me, but for the life of me I cannot make this rotate. I am looking at this photo in my editing software and it is rotated perfectly. Blogger-sometimes I hate you. 

Anyway! I am just loving my new toy and trying to find as many reasons to use it, so if you have any ideas let me know! I am more than willing to send you school teachers anything you need or Moms if you need some personalized invitations or ANYTHING, let me know! I am more than willing to help a sister (or a brother) out!

I hope that back to school has been easy and painless for you and your's. Much love from the McGraw's!

Pinspiration vs. Pincopying

I have developed a new pet peeve, and it is when people go on Pinterest and copy verbatim from someone else. This really is ridiculous, you don't have to tell me that because several people already have, but it bugs me. Don't get me wrong, Pinterest is a great tool! I just think it's so sad because when you copy something detail for detail, it's not personal to you. You will look back at pictures and always think, "I copied that from someone" rather than "I took a great idea, and made it my own and personal to my event." 

There is a big difference between 'pinspiration' and 'pincopying.' For example, when it came to Macy's birthday party I had lots of 'pinspiration!'

This image was a HUGE inspiration for Macy's party. I knew that I wanted to carnival theme, but I am such a sucker for clever word play so this was a must!

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Here's how I used that inspiration.

Credit: Amylu Photography

Credit: Amylu Photography

Cupcakes are all the rage right now, but I wanted something different that you wouldn't see at all the other parties you were going to this summer. So, I chose to do cake balls and used this photo as my inspiration. 

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Here's how our cake balls turned out.

Credit: Amylu Photography

And here was Macy's smash cake ball...

Credit: Amylu Photography

The highchair was also very important to me. It needed to be perfect because so many pictures of Macy would be taken in this high chair. Below was the dream highchair, but I think what we had was even better!

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Credit: Amylu Photography

You rock, DB! Thank you for finding this for me and creating such fun decor to go with it!

I love the venue where we had Macy's party, but I wanted a ceiling treatment. There are so many cool things you can do using very little of your budget. I used the picture below, as well as few others, to try and communicate the vision I had for the chadelier-type ceiling treatment.

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This is what my fabulous friends were able to make.

Credit: Amylu Photography

I love looking at pictures from Macy's party. I love thinking to myself, 'Every detail is personal to Macy and to our family,' and I take pride in every single detail.  Again, this is a personal thing. I do not think you are a terrible person if you copy something straight from Pinterest, NO! Some things can't be helped, I just hope that you will put your own personal touches on whatever it is by changing colors, or wording, or WHATEVER! 

After all that, I'm going to step off my soap box! Goodnight!

BOWS!

So, I love bows on babies. Unfortunately, Macy likes to play with bows more than wear them on her head. I have found a solution for the time being- smaller bows. The smaller they are, the quicker she forgets about them. So my quest to find small bows led me of course to Pinterest where I was able to find a super cute goldfish bow, and was able to follow the tutorial here!

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Here's how I did it. Start out with one long strip (tutorial above suggests 7", but that was way too long for what I wanted), and then you will need three 1" strips. Sorry for the poor iPhone photography!

Then you fold the ribbon in half length-wise, and then pull the top part off to the side.

You want this part to be a little puffy because you don't want your gold fish to have a flat head! So you just have to play with it until it looks good to you.

Then pinch at the spot that gives you enough fluff, I put a dot of hot glue on mine to make sure it held the way I wanted it. You can see when you compare the picture above and the picture below how much length I ended up taking off, it was unfortunate. 

Then you take one of the small strips and wrap the spot where you were pinching. I also took this opportunity to make sure the 'tails' were even. 

Next you want to make his arms. Take the other two smaller strips, put a dot of hot glue on one end, then fold over like below.

You are so close to the end! Next you will position the arms in the way that looks best to you. I chose to have them pointing down, like the little guy was swimming!

Lastly, you add an adhesive wiggly eye and the little guy comes to life! Again, the iPhone is not the best camera for these pictures. Sorry!

This was just one of the bows I was making for Macy this past Saturday. One item I would suggest is using something different than the 'snap' clips. I got them because they stay really well in Macy's hair, but I wasn't thinking of how I would attach the flat bows to a curved surface. I just had to add a bit more hot glue than I would've wanted to. But that's okay, we only need them for a little while long until Macy gets a little more hair. After I was done, I put them all in here hair. She didn't even try to pull them out, SUCCESS!

However, she was ready for me to stop taking pictures.

I got the cute ribbon from Pick Your Plum, which runs specials on different craft supplies every week day. When I got done with the bows, I went out to my mailbox to find that the super fun cupcake liners and paper straws had both come in! Woohoo!

In other news, this happened today. Macy was snacking on some puffs, then took the bottle off into the kitchen, dumped puffs on the floor, and continued eating them in between play breaks. Yeah, I let this happen...

Could I Be So Lucky?!

So, as you know, I have been wanting barn doors for my bedroom to separate it from our no-doors bathroom. Well, there are also a few other things, that I haven't told you about, that I have been coveting lately that all have to do with wood. 

First, let's revisits barn doors in all their glory.

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Problem: barn doors = EXPENSIVE! They like them quite a bit too... 

Second, let's talk about my raging need for a new headboard. 

Obviously, this is back when we put in the new carpet. I do have side tables, they were just moved out in our living room during the install. But I still think this photo shows you the problems with our headboard. It's too short. We have extra high ceilings which I would never change, but some of my older decor that I've had since we got married and bought for when we moved into our first house in Lubbock is starting to just not work. I loved this headboard when I bought it. I stalked it at Pier One for a good long while and was finally able to afford it when it went on sale, as well as coupled with a coupon. Anyway, like I said, it's just not working anymore, but on top of that I don't have hundreds of dollars to spend on a new headboard while we are trying to save for our renovation projects. So, I started pinning ideas for new headboards off of DIY sites and was trying to think of ways to be super thrifty and crafty, but I fell in love with this project idea from Lowe's.

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Can you imagine? I'm also planning to create a companion footboard in the same style. Brilliant, and Lowe's has created a shopping list and step-by-step instructions which is even better. Still a problem though, because all the supplies are expensive.

Something else that I have been wildly coveting but have no chance of getting are these beauties. 

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When I finally tracked these bad boys down, with no help from the original pinner who apparently pinned the image off of Google (I'm touching on one of my soap boxes, but I'm leaving it there), they were $700 for one. Obviously, you would need at least two, but I wouldn't turn my nose up to three. There is no way I could ever do that. Ever. No matter what.

Well, at this point you are probably asking yourself, "Why is she writing this post about everything she can't have?!" Good question, my friends. The truth is, I may have found a way to make all of my 'wood 

dreams' come true. We ran into our buddy who, ironically, is also our financial advisor, at church the other night and in passing he said, "Do you know of anyone who needs any extra wood? We had to cut down a massive tree in our yard, and we have tons of logs, panels, and stumps that we have no idea what to do with." I think I may have peed myself a little at that moment. That's how excited I was. Now, I have no idea if what he has will work, but I am crossing every finger, toe and limb hoping that this will be the solution to all things wood-y that I want in my house.

Could I really be that lucky? We shall find out... 

Character Analysis for Me

So about a year ago, I was in graduate school for educational leadership. It was basically a program to be certified to become a principal or superintendent. About halfway through I found out I was pregnant, then proceeded to get wickedly sick ALL the time, and finally decided that it may not be for me. However, before I stopped taking the courses, we took a character analysis questionnaire. It's amazing to me how straight on these can be, sometimes. I'll be the first one to point out that not all of these qualities look good on me, but for the most part I guess they are true. I'm not so sure that 'dislikes committees and group discussions' is quite so accurate, and I'd like to think I'm not rigid and impersonal. Oh well, agree to disagree.  Take a look at my results. Can you relate to some of these?

Characteristics of the Directive Style	Others May Perceive Your Style As	Best Organizational Fit
Focuses on tasks and technical problems Considers facts, rules, and procedures Acquires information through hunches and by using short reports with limited data Evaluates information by using intuition, experience, and rules Has a low tolerance for ambiguity and needs structure	Rigid Impersonal Simplistic Autocratic	Structured, goal-oriented, such as in bureaucracies, or where power and authority are important
Typical Leadership Style Characteristics of Those with a Directive Decision-Making Style
Practical and authoritarian Impersonal social orientation Needs power and status Is forceful Dislikes committees and group discussions Completes tasks quickly Action and results oriented Motivated by situations with measurable achievement potential, tangible rewards

 I just ran across this as I was cleaning out my email inbox on my phone and thought it was interesting enough to share. Anyway, about a week and a half ago we were on a wonderful vacation with my family to the beaches in Destin, Florida. It was Macy's first time and she loved it. Here are some of my favorite pictures from our trip. 

Lucky for us we have the Lifeproof Cases, so we were able to take our phones into the water!

Happy August! We have finally made it, the summer is slowing down and hopefully our crazy lives will slow down a little bit. :) I hope the same for you and yours!